This is how I’ve been feeling lately. Tangled. All mixed up. Confused. Also torn apart and depressed and unmotivated.
Why? Lots of reasons. I’m moving – the day is coming up faster and faster – yet I feel no motivation to pack my stuff. Not sure exactly why that is. Am I excited about the new place or not? Am I worried about paying the rent? Yeah, a little, but I know I can afford it so why am I so ambivalent? Why am I finding so stinking hard to pack? Maybe because I’m doing it all alone?
Like I will be pretty much everything from here on out?
That’s the reason for the depression, I know. One of the by-products of working from home is that I’m alone. I don’t go to an office, don’t interact with people. I’m here in my house with my cats – end of story. I’m turning into my mom – I no longer know how to make friends or where to do to do it.
And my best friend is leaving. The one person that I share so many likes and loves: we like (mostly) the same movies, she loves musicals, we like the same foods and we’re both willing to experiment. We love the outdoors – although is different ways, but we can relate to each others differences. We speak the same language on many different levels.
And she’s leaving the state.
And that makes me sad.
Seems like just a couple of months ago I jotted down some thoughts, now I look and BAM! It’s been months! No excuses really, except life. It was a full summer, then I moved and now I’ve finally set up my Mac – lots going on.
And I have no real thoughts or wisdom right now either. Except that its cold. Like really cold. Like COLD! And I think the tires on my car are flat because I don’t drive it more than once a week or so. And Moon keeps jumping up on my desk – he wants something, I just can’t figure out what it is.
And I’m going to be a great-aunt! Nick and Liz are having a baby boy.
And I have a LOT of yarn! 10 IKEA bins full plus 5 sweater bags… I so gotta stop buying yarn and start knitting it, ya think? I didn’t realize how much I had until I moved and put my yarn storage in the living room – wow. I thought time went fast – so does stash building! That feeds into my resolution – no more yarn until at least 3 of those 5 sweaters is done and I knock down at least 3 bins. Its going to be a challenge, yes – but I’m up for it. No more buying patterns either. I keep looking for ‘that perfect pattern’ for me, but how will I know one if I’ve only knit one sweater? I need to make a few more, so I know what looks good on me and how to alter a pattern to fit better. I joined a KAL on Ravelry – a sweater in the month of January – that should help. Plus its being run by the designer – I’ll be able to ask questions right away and get answers – that’s kind of exciting.
And I need to shut the computer down and have dinner… toodles!
Now isn’t that pretty? It’s really nice leaf pattern from Spud and Chloe’s Folkstory Cardi pattern. I’m making one for Becky out of lovely Valley Yarns Suprewash. Oh! So soft! And really lovely colors.
Too bad it didn’t look like this all the way around.
You see – I have a confession to make: I have a problem with pattern knitting. No matter if I work from a chart or from text, I can’t seem to knit in pattern for a sustained period.
I haven’t nailed down the issue yet. I’ve never really knit in anything more complex than a rib, so I’m really a novice at this. I’ve done a few socks in patterns on the leg portion, but even those were rocky. I’d get off count and my pattern would just go awry – to be fixed again on the next repeat. I never bother much with socks if I get off pattern – nobody’s going to see it but me. But a sweater is a whole ‘nother animal. Especially a sweater for someone else – and a pattern she chose.
One thing I’m going to try – not sure if this will help, but I’m going to try an actual pattern map. This sweater has 233 stitches cast on and the pattern is a 10 stitch repeat + 3. I should be able to create some sort of map that I can use to keep track of my progress across the row. It’s only the knit rows that are a problem – opposite rows are all purl.
So research…. I must do research! You see – all those years working in libraries WILL come in handy. If I can do anything it’s research!
Does anybody remember these? Well Becky and I saw a pair at Cream City Yarn that just blew us away and so I decided to make a pair for her. I thought they had printed up the pattern for me, but I couldn’t find it. Turns out that it was listed on Ravelry from Purl Bee and it’s free!! Check it out: http://www.purlbee.com/the-purl-bee/2008/4/14/whits-knits-pom-pom-peds.html. So I proceeded to buy the yarn – Tosh Sock in a wild neon yellow-green. I love how fast these are working up. The author is right when she says you get to work on all the fun bits – the foot and heel!